Congrats, Draco - You're Old
by 606
Summary: That drabble where Draco turns thirty-four, his fellow Slytherins are amused traitors, and Harry gives him smut as a present. (non-epilogue compliant, HP/DM, COMPLETE)


ooOoo

Congrats, Draco. You're Old.

ooOoo

"No."

"Draco, come on."

"_No_. I'm not going in there."

Harry sighed. "Everyone's expecting you, Draco. We can't just leave."

Draco sniffed haughtily, crossing his arms tightly across his chest. "Yes, we can. Going in there would only confirm it."

Harry smiled bemusedly. "Draco, we all know it's your thirty-fourth birthday; not letting everyone throw you a party isn't going to change that."

"Potter, I told you not to say that number out-loud! It makes me sound too fucking…old," he hissed.

Harry rolled his eyes, leaning back against the wall next to the closed door. "Fine. We'll just wait until Pansy – or worse, Molly – comes out and drags you in. That'll put you in your place," he said with a grin, closing his eyes as he relaxed against the brick, sunbathing lazily.

Draco stared at him. "You are a horrible husband."

Harry cracked open an eyelid. "Whatever, Grandpa."

Draco reached out, pinching the thin skin on the back of Harry's hand tightly. "Oi! That hurts," Harry yelped, trying, but unable, to supress his smile as he caught Draco's wrist in his grasp. The frown lines around Draco's mouth smoothed away as Harry kissed his palm chastely.

The two shared a long look before the aging Slytherin huffed out a defeated breath. "Fine, let's get this bloody thing over with, you smug prat."

Harry beamed as he stood, slipping his hand into Draco's before pulling open the front door.

"SURPRISE!"

ooOoo

"Daddy?"

"Yes, Scorpius?" Draco looked down at the four-year-old who was tugging at his knee, Harry's green eyes staring up at him from under straying strands of blond hair.

"H-how old are you?" Draco glanced at Theo and Blaise, who watched on with amusement.

"I'm thirty, Scor. Thir-ty." His son nodded enthusiastically before running off into the small sea of acquaintances, no doubt off to torture another poor soul with his newfound knowledge.

"Classy," Blaise commented dryly as he took another sip of his wine.

"What?"

"Lying makes you a bad parent, Dray-Dray."

"Oh, fuck off; our parents lied to us all the time, and we turned out fine."

"Yes, a bunch of Gryffindor-loving, ex-Death Eater snakes – we _are_ the ideal, aren't we?" Pansy cut in as she slid next to Draco, her new wedding ring sparkling in the sunlight.

"Oi, don't lump me and Theo in with you two. We're wholesome Slytherin-lovers, thank you very much," Blaise said with pride, throwing an arm over Theo, who merely shrugged in response.

"Those lions are good in bed, aren't they?" Theo said expressionlessly. Blaise gasped with mock disgust.

"You too? Oh, Merlin, where have all the honest Slytherins gone?" The four friends laughed, Theo, Draco and Pansy clinking their drinks together before taking a swing.

"Draco! Oh, Draco, darling!"

The blood drained from Draco's already pale face. "Oh, Merlin, it's Molly. Hide me!" He hissed to the others. They grinned mercilessly.

"He's over here, Molly," Pansy called loudly, much to Draco's outrage.

"I'll get you for this you little bit- Molly! Oh, I didn't see you there," Draco said with his fakest smile, cursing his friends mentally.

The elderly Weasley beamed youthfully, the laughter lines around her eyes crinkling with cheer. "Come on, dear. It's time for cake! Your mother has it set up in the kitchen." Draco held back the rueful laugh that caught in his chest, knowing his mother probably sent Molly on purpose, knowing how much Draco could barely stand the woman, even after all these years.

"Right, of course it is. Just let me grab Harry and the boys-"

"Oh, no need – they're already waiting!"

"Of course they are."

Molly turned to the rest of the congregation. "Everyone to the kitchen! Time to sing to the birthday boy!" Draco glared icily over his shoulder at the beaming group of traitors, who raised their glasses to him as Molly forcefully ushered him through the crowd.

The people parted in front of him, eventually leading him to a monstrous, icing-covered slab of cake that weighed down the rickety kitchen table, Harry and Teddy's smug grins on the opposite side of the candlelit confection, with Scor's bright mop of hair just peaking over the edge of the wooden surface.

"Alright, everyone: HAPPY BIRTHDAY-"

ooOoo

"Merlin, that was torture," Draco groaned as he gracefully fell back onto his and Harry's bed. Harry snorted as he began unbuttoning his shirt, watching his husband through the mirror on their closet door.

"What, is Grandpa too tired from all of the attention?"

"Fuck off, Potter," Draco closed his eyes as he sunk into the pillows. "You'll be this old in a month, and I'm going to make it hell for you."

A heavy weight pressed down on the edge of the mattress, causing Draco to open his eyes. Harry loomed above him, a smirk on his mouth as he pulled off his glasses, setting them on the nightstand. "Oh, really, Ferret? Think you'll still have the energy to harass me?"

Draco grinned, reaching up to tug at the short hairs on the back of Harry's skull. "Of course, Scarhead; I always have the energy to harass you." He tilted his chin up, catching Harry's amused huff with his mouth, replying with his own pleased hum.

Draco couldn't help but be thankful that Pansy and Ginny had agreed to keep Teddy and Scor for the night as he sat up, letting Harry pull his shirt over his head and unbutton his trousers. "Is this my birthday present? I expected more, honestly," Draco deadpanned as Harry pressed small kisses and bites into the thin skin of his jaw, those warm, rough fingers trailing over his hipbones.

"Well, how about we use the gift you got me for Christmas?" Draco swallowed as Harry licked at his clavicle.

"Fine. I guess that would be satisfactor-_oh!_" Harry smiled as he lightly bit Draco's nipple, flicking it softly with his tongue in a maddening way that caused Draco to arch his back in encouragement.

"Fuck, Harry, stop teasing," Draco panted as his hips twitched, rubbing against Harry's denim-clad groin. The two men groaned in unison, unconsciously leaning towards each other for a dirty, heated kiss.

Harry leaned back on his knees, allowing Draco to take a few deep breaths of air as he held out his hand, wandlessly calling for the drawer on the nightstand to open itself. The indulgent tinkling of metal sounded in the air, and the silver sparkled in the low light from the lamp. Draco swallowed again as Harry ran his fingers over the sleek handcuffs.

"Do you remember your safe-word?"

"Of course I do, Potter," Draco dismissed breathily as Harry ran cool fingers up his arm, moving his wrist to the bar on the headboard. The slight weight of the circle of metal that Harry clasped around his wrist made Draco sigh.

"Oh, really? Than say it."

Draco moved his other wrist to the underside of the bar, waiting for Harry to finish, but the green-eyed man merely waited. "Fine! It's Hufflepuff, you prick. Huffle-puff." Harry smirked.

"Good boy."

Draco rolled his eyes, opening his mouth to rebuff the idiotic endearment, but Harry caught his bottom lip between his teeth, finally finishing securing Draco's other wrist, leaving the Slytherin without the use of his arms. Harry sat back, admiring the long, pale plane of Draco's torso.

Draco watched, his heart beating fast, as Harry leaned down, pushing his briefs off and letting Draco's cock slip free, letting it leak clear drops of pre-come onto his abdomen. He tested the strength of the cuffs, a spark of pleasure running down his spine at the restriction.

Draco hissed out a breath as Harry pressed his lips to the vein on the underside of his cock, licking a brief stripe before letting the air cool it. Shivers ran up Draco's spine. "Potter, either suck my cock or not – it's not that hard of a choice," Draco sneered, the arrogance ruined by the clear strain in his voice. Harry merely grinned, shuffling down the bed and propping himself up on his elbows between Draco's spread legs.

"Fine, your majesty. I won't, then." Draco glared at him, rattling his wrists lightly against the dark metal bar he was chained to. Harry's grin was impish.

"Well do _something_, then, Potter!" Draco finally burst out, resisting the urge to kick his husband off the bed.

"Okay. All you had to do was ask," Harry said matter-of-factly before lifting Draco's hips and licking the sensitive skin behind his balls.

"Fuck!" Draco cursed as Harry spread his cheeks, running his hot, wet tongue over his hole. He gasped, digging his fingernails into his palms as Harry began working in a finger, the soft burn, the gradual stretch causing Draco to arch his back, seeking more contact. Harry licked at the rim as a second finger joined the first, scissoring open the tight hole.

"Merlin, Potter – just put it in already!" Draco demanded, opening his eyes and wondering when he'd shut them in the first place.

"Not yet, Draco," Harry said simply, sitting up, but never breaking the steady rhythm he was thrusting his fingers into Draco's arse. Using his other hand, Harry unbuttoned the front of his jeans, which were tented from the pressure of his painfully-hard prick. His flushed cock peaked over the waistband, rising from the dark hairs at the base.

"Were you not wearing pants this – _ah!_ - whole time?" Draco laughed brokenly, painfully aroused at the thought, beginning to lose himself as Harry's fingers crooked, rubbing his prostate mercilessly.

"Yup. I figured you'd approve," Harry groaned as he gave his cock a quick squeeze. He stretched out a hand, and the lube shot into his palm. He flicked open the cap with a soft _pop_, reaching down and withdrawing his fingers, causing Draco to gasp quietly at the empty feeling. Harry squirted the slick liquid onto his fingers, finally pushing three into Draco's stretched hole. Draco bit back a reedy moan.

"Now, Harry!" He finally choked out, his skin feeling pulled tight across his body. Heat washed over him in waves, the warm metal on his wrists and Harry's tight grip on his hip his only anchors.

Draco closed his eyes as Harry withdrew his fingers, the younger man leaning over Draco's prone form. They both groaned as Harry finally pressed in, Draco's hole tightening around the new addition. "Fuck," Harry panted somewhere around Draco's ear. Wet heat pressed against his mouth, and Draco eagerly returned the kiss, feeling oddly overwhelmed as Harry ruthlessly continued to push into him.

"Y'alright?" Harry whispered against his lips when his hips were flush against Draco's arse, the rough fabric of his jeans sending another spark of heat through his limbs. Draco squeezed his eyelids more firmly closed as he pushed past the brief pain that was like an old friend. He worried at his bottom lip as he drew his legs up, crossing his ankles against Harry's arse.

He peeked open his eyes. "Yeah, I'm good," he breathed as he stared into Harry's gaze, that same concerned look that had been present since the first time they did this so many years ago. He leaned up as far as he could with his arms still secured above his head, pressing his lips against Harry's jaw. "Now move, you bastard."

The words had barely left his mouth before Harry was rolling his hips, slowly withdrawing before ramming his prick back into Draco, who gasped embarrassingly. Harry showed no mercy, leaning down to suck one of Draco's nipples into his mouth as he continued to shove into him, drawing continuously louder noises from Draco's lips.

"Oh, _fuck_ – Harry, I –" Draco mumbled, urgently wishing he could touch his own cock as he raced towards his orgasm. His husband seemed to understand, catching Draco's lips with his own as he grasped Draco's leaking cock with the hand that he wasn't balancing on. He flicked his thumb against the sensitive head, tearing a desperate keening sound from Draco's throat as Harry's cock brushed against his prostate at just the right angle.

Draco bit down on Harry's lip as he came, hot spurts of come splattering across his stomach and chest, smearing against Harry's torso as he fucked Draco through it, his thrusts becoming more erratic.

That heady bliss was sending shocks up and down Draco's limbs as he gasped for air, feeling Harry's desperate, hot puffs of air against his temple. "Come on, Harry," he whispered, pressing a kiss to that rough chin. "You can do it; come in me," he urged, squeezing his legs more tightly around Harry's waist.

That sent the Gryffindor over the edge, his broken moan causing Draco to smile smugly against his sweaty skin, warmth filling him up as Harry came and came.

"Good boy," Draco mumbled jokingly as Harry's arm gave out, causing him to fall ungracefully on top of the thoroughly-fucked blond. Harry whispered the spell to unlock the cuffs, chuckling against Draco's neck as long, pale fingers fondly ran through the messy locks on the back of his skull.

The world was quiet for a pure, intimate moment.

"Happy birthday, Draco," Harry said as he pressed a kiss to the soft skin underneath Draco's ear.

Draco smiled, silently thanking Merlin for such a perfect day.

ooOoo

Fin

ooOoo

**606's Note:** So…Fluff! Smut! Look at my first attempt! Oh, and Scor's existence can be rationalized however you'd like: surrogate, mPreg, magic, whatever floats your boat. But he's both of their kid, genetically. ;)


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